We're pouring the chai and the butterbeer and a bottle of Old Ogden's Fire Whiskey tonight as we prepare for one of the great miracles that the world has ever known - the peaceful transfer of power in the United States of America. It truly is amazing, the one president just packs up all his boxes and the next one comes in and picks out the drapes. And then we party all day and all night in celebration. And the world watches in amazement, having witnessed our campaigning and how we daily tear one another down only to come together tomorrow as Americans first.
Why, even the Middle East called a cease fire.
So gather around the tables, toast the new and the old, and enjoy the cream pies and popcorn. It's Inaugural Eve at the Cafe. God bless America.